"WHY, I NEVER!" IN PORTLAND

Jeani had never.  Never had she been in a Menards, eaten a White Castle, driven a Mach I, drank Oliver wine, tasted Wicks Cream Pie, entered a Pizza King, or bit into an elephant ear.  It was a week of firsts.

Cinnamon, sugar, fried bread -- an elephant ear,  "This is dang good!"

White Castle, "I have to eat your cracker to get rid of the taste."

Wicks Cream Pie, "That was good."

Oliver wine, "Let's stop at that store and buy a couple more."  ROFL

Then she stepped out of son's Mustang, "Wow!  It's a legal race car, but it's not a race car!"  Then her phone rang (her son has a safety tracking device on it), she ignored it twice to take her turn on the board game.  "Mom.  What're ya doin'?"  "Playing games."  "Mom, you were going 109 miles an hour!" "Oh, that,"  giggle and laugh, "I was driving Calvin's Mach 1."  

(Speeding down a country road avoiding a cornfield donut, she was!)

There are very few Pizza King's around.  

For son Clint's birthday wish and 

Jeani another first, pizza we ate.  

No room for birthday pie until later, after 

a good game of  Ticket To Ride, when we dived into our favorite frozen desserts.

"Pass the Pigs!"   "Toss 'em!  Like dice."  Jeani dropped 2 cute little pink pigs onto the table.  She'd opened her game box chock-full of dice, cards, boards, markers, etc.  Players get the most points if one lands on its snout, "Oink, snorkel!"

Who's awake?  In the camper's top bunk I could see the light from Spencer's cellphone screen.  He's awake.  Jeani, I couldn't tell.  It was A/C cold in cramped quarters.  My head was pillowcase wrapped.  I'd misplaced my glasses.  I bent down low, eyeball to eyeball, to see if she was awake.  There was a disturbance in her force.  Covered to the chin in blankets, she slowly opened her eyes, rolled them to me,  rared back and SCREAMED!  I was shocked! 

Rakeb Olson (name changed to protect ... the innocent?  Nah, she's not innocent, she's a character, LOL), was darling hubby and sons co-worker.  Standing next to her husband, catching up with the guys on their lives current news, she said her hubby's back just went out a day or so before the Portland tractor show.  I wasn't sure what this next was all about, but waiting in our golf cart I busted a gut when I heard her say,  

"He be insured and fed."

“Why, I never!”  That’s a first on me!