MORE - JOHN'S FUNNY

Four Quick Quips

Homemade bread and oatmeal raisin cookies were given to us from friend Nova to take home.  Munching his favorite cookies, John said, “I’m gonna have to talk to her. I may love her.“

 

As for chewing on the homemade bread, later he said, “This is a real treat for us. Oh, my, it smells good. This is wonderful. I do not need a bread machine. I’d be eating fresh bread everyday!” 

John said to one of the boys who was waiting for the school bus,  "Get out there!  The bus will never find you hiding behind that tree!” 

John gave Ian some wine for his cold, "That’ll curdle the critters in your stomach!"

Welcoming Garage Sale Customers

John, dear hubby, has his own way he likes to welcome customers coming into my garage sales.  Not only is he a very friendly person, but he's always encouraging, and it's obvious he wants to help me out, and ... because he wants stuff out of the garage, he means it when he says,"What ever you find or like, I can help you load it up!"

Young Calvin & John 

John says “Calvin's electric abilities when working on his Falcon are amazing! 

Amazingly low!”

 

At the barn while working on the ‘68 Falcon the alternator light came on.  Dad asked him, “What’s that mean?” Calvin admitted, “I don’t know.”

 

John looks at me with big eyes, “He grounded a positive wire.”

 

Now, the males around here are sing-songing, “If in doubt ground it out.”

What Spencer Can Afford

We were out for a sunny drive looking at property in Lapel.  Almost home, being silly, Spencer says, “I want to buy Purgatory!” Purgatory is a golf course a mile east of us.   Dad quickly responds, “Not for sale.”  Spencer pretends in the back seat, “Still….it would be nice.”  To make his point Dad tells him, “You couldn’t afford that dead tree!” Bad Under Obama　 I heard John saying to the boys, “ That’s how bad it was under President Obama.“ Then he laughs, “That‘s what you can tell your kids some day about the good ole days,”  What was he really talking about? Well, it started with a huge wet mess under the bathroom sink! John and I took everything out -- the mouth wash, the scouring powder, the first aid box, extra shampoos, and a package of toilet paper. The floor under the sink was saturated with water from some yet undiscovered leak.  The package of toilet paper was saturated, too.  So, I set the three rolls on the window sill to see if they’d dry out so we could use them. This tickled John. He called it a memorable day, “The Obama Years were soooo bad, we had to dry toilet paper on the window sill to reuse it!”  Carolyn & Baby Carolyn is my great-cousin, who is 86 years old.  Her cats are gone, they died.  She now has a small dog, a terrier she’s named Baby.  The name it came with was Yogi but she prefers Baby.   She exclaims, “I kid you not, hon, it looks like a deer. Like a fawn. Just like that!” She was riding in the front seat of our vehicle.  Hubby, I, and another friend, were taking her to dinner.   The older gentleman, our friend, was a trapper, and a hunter.  I could see his shoulders shaking in laughter when John said, “Well, don’t let it out during hunting season.”